Moncton Doula Care

Posted By Earthama on June 15, 2009

On the day Maya was born…

It was May 5, 2008 at 8:20 in the evening. The moon was new and this Taurus supermoon was ripe for new beginnings as it hovered closely to the earth. Cinco de Mayo was being celebrated in the land of Mexico, where I spent most of the pregnancy, which is quite appropriate for a Baby named Maya.

As the beginning of May approached I waited eagerly to welcome this child that felt feminine right from the start of the pregnancy. The name Maya presented itself after the first month. Maya means born in May, illusion~enchantment, Buddha’s mother was Queen Maya and there are the Maya indigenous culture of Mexico. I feel a chosen name is important and is part of our path in the world so this was contemplated quite a bit throughout pregnancy.

I went to bed on the night of May 4th and a short time after laying down began to feel the gentle squeezes of the birth to come. Throughout the night those squeezes became stronger and stronger waking me from sleep. Eventually at 6:45 am I decided to get up and take a shower to relax. Before getting into the shower I realized there was blood tinged show which meant things were progressing. My toddler slept in the bed while I showered and then went to the couch to get some extra rest. After a while the squeezes stopped and I wasn’t sure what was happening. I continued on with the day as usual, but didn’t go out knowing that Baby was getting ready to enter into the world.

Later that day when the two year old was going to nap I layed down with him and within five minutes the squeezes began again! After a few it was time to get out of bed and find a more comfortable position. I went to the couch and couldn’t sleep so read instead. This time the squeezes continued on becoming stronger and more frequent. This was late afternoon. A friend came over that was to be present for the birth and hung out with the toddler while I went into birthing mode. They listened to fables and music with each other as things progressed.

Around 7:00 I headed to the shower. Water has always worked for me during birthing and I knew this meant Baby was coming soon. After the shower the contractions became stronger. I began bracing myself against the wall and breathing. I was focusing on my body opening, blossoming like a flower for Baby to come through. I moved towards the door closing the blinds most of the way and found a view of the woods to help me feel connected to the earth. I breathed in the fresh air with an oncoming contraction and pulled the door shut to keep people from hearing my tribal chant. There was this emotion of frustration within me. Why does society not accept childbirth as a natural event? Why must I contain my voice to this small space so ‘nobody hears?’ Because I choose to have this child in my home and trust my body to give birth. I am wombyn giving birth!

I see the trees and imagine the roots going deep into the earth as my eyes close. Breathing deeply I too have roots firmly planted within Mother Earth. Just as she nourishes me I have nourished this child for nine months and now it is time for Baby to be birthed.

I could feel the Babies head moving down and my body opening as I went to the closet for cloths and supplies. I began spreading the cloth onto the floor in front of the couch and my friend came to help me. I kneeled with my upper body laying on the couch and a yoga pillow beneath me in the usual birthing position. This opened the body quickly and the next contraction my water broke. I removed my sarong and told my son the Baby was coming. Mama suggested he get his monkey, bear and Waldorf doll Rainbow and sit on the edge of the bed which was right next to me. He sat quietly as Baby entered the tranquil, dimly lit room.

My friend was quick to tell me ’I was right.’ Baby was a girl! As I greeted her, her tiny body was covered in vernix, more than any of the other kids had ever been. Asaya came over to greet his new sister smiling wide eyed. We greeted her with a song. “Welcome to the spinning world, welcome to the green earth, we are so glad you’ve come.” He was a little unsure about the blood part, but we talked about it and all was well.

I kept the cord attached for quite some time. It had been more than an hour and the placenta wasn’t out. My body needed to move. I tied off the cord with a piece of gold hemp and clipped it. This was an emotional moment more than ever before for some reason. I then squatted over the container waiting for the placenta. It was almost two hours before it passed out of the body. Examining the placenta, it was perfect.

After I cleaned up it was time for water and food. Sitting with Baby at the breast I ate peaches and grapes with the friend spoon feeding me yogurt, Asaya by my side. I was SO hungry.

We spent a while bonding and then prepared to go to bed. My friend made sure that all was well and left us to sleep. After the experience Asaya took quite a long time to fall asleep. Baby and I ended up spending most of the night on the couch sitting. She was very eager to learn about her new world and wanted to look around. So, I turned on a night light and sat with her.

Baby and I will enjoy our Babymoon over these next few weeks. She and I will stay in our sacred space and enjoy walks through Nature. She will not be ’exposed’ to the energy of ’the world’ for as long as possible. In other words, no shopping excursions or large gatherings for this girl.

Asaya has been adjusting to being a brother pretty well over the past week. He loves to hold her and show her the wooden animals naming them one by one. He has also spent time with our friend playing outside, going to the market and riding the bus. He enjoys spending time playing near Maya and Mama. As I write this he is studying her feet and can’t keep his face out of hers. Our word of the year will be ’gentle.’

Being a single mama is not always the easiest and I am very thankful to have had a friend to help out. His going to the market, spending time with Asaya and companionship for Mama has made this transition easier. Honestly I do feel frustration at times, but it is then that I come to the present moment and am grateful. The words ‘this too shall pass’ help a lot. It is a wise choice for a single mama to learn to nurture herself through pregnancy and beyond. We are worth it no matter what society and others say. If you ever have the opportunity to offer support to a single mama please consider it.

As I sat looking at little Maya a couple days ago the illusion of things began to fall away. I saw this child inside my body preparing to enter the world. She began from all that is and her body was nourished from mine into this little being. The miracle of a Baby and childbirth is beyond words. Even though I have given birth seven times this realization was somehow different this time. Holding her small body within my arms and seeing her beautiful face feeling how can we not recognize that we all come from the same Source and that we are all connected? I look over to my toddler and realize that the belief of separation from one another begins so soon. Breathing deeply I want to keep this feeling that is being experienced right now, but then the words come….this too shall pass.

Category: Birth Stories
Tags: birth, birth experience, birth story, child birth, conscious choice, homebirth, Natural Pregnancy, personal choice